Smiling likes an angel

Usual day, wake late, thinking for a moment about what I dream last night. Close my eyes prayed and said thanks you for my beautiful life. I can breathe and seeing my small world this morning not morning but well thanks God for everything you have done to me. Jump from bed; wash my face with cool water and listening music again and again one cassette Sheila On 7. Wish I brought a lot of Indonesian cassette or CD anything from back home. Damn I am really missing my crowded Jakarta. I miss my annoying family. I miss my big room with a lot of cute creature. I know for my age that not appropriated to have that toys but whom cared I like hugged them I like to see their cute faces, I like to collect them, and I like to throw and punched them when I am mad. What a wonderful friendship between my lovely toys and me. And now what should I do when I am mad, biking my bike around the river fast and faster until your madness relive from your heart and your head or I can just jump from 4th floor my apartment hahahahaha that good idea but I am not ready to meet with my creator and I have owe to my parent. So chose option number 1. And I am loved my boyfriend a lot that meant I can leave him now. So don’t worry honey. I never jump from balcony. That temping see green grass and you can felt fresh air in your face. And can’t you imagined when you jump open your arms like a bird. Air punched your face and your body. Trust to earth they will take care your body. You felt free and tomorrow Ottawa citizen will cover my story. Hem I can imagine that become headlines. Beautiful ladies from far away island named happiness. Death in white dress pose like bird and smiling likes an angel. I must choose the best dress and the best pose. So maybe after my death people will think to made movie about me. Wait I must erase that damn thinking from my head or my boyfriend will ask me move to first floor. No way I am really like this small apartment. You can see river for your balcony, you can see beautiful sky formation with different color everyday. And when rain comes I can see God made very good lightning and thunder. Oh God you really creative. And now still with Duta singing same song everyday. And me with my messy hair, and stinky body. Missing my Jakarta and my lovely house. HUH I miss a lot…………….